BUGS, APPLES, NUTS

 

I’ve lived in my house for almost 50 years and this year, in regards to nature, has been the oddest year I’ve experienced.

 

I have an apple tree in my back yard that has produced apples in prior years, but nothing like 2015. This has been a record year. I actually cannot keep up with the crop. There’s a pile under the tree that is still growing. One effect is that I have become somewhat of a cook, which has never been true. My wife was the cook. I was the bread winner and home maintenance man. This year, I have baked 2 apple crisps, 1 apple pie and I even made about 1 quart and a half of apple sauce. They all came out fine but I’m still not done. There will be another couple of pies. Now I have to decide what to do with the pile of apples under the tree.

 

I also have a cherry tree in the yard and it had a nice crop this year. Unfortunately, the squirrels and birds beat me to them and I never got to taste one cherry.

 

I have a beech tree in my front yard. Over the years, it has always dropped nuts on the ground. Also, the squirrels have had a feast every year, dropping the shells on the ground. In the past, it was easy to rake them up and discard them in the garbage. Again, thus year was a record year. I have never seen so many nuts and shells on my front lawn, The only way to get rid of them is to rake them into piles, then put them into trash cans, but you can only fill the cans halfway because they get too heavy. In years past, I’d have about 4 or 5 cans that I put curbside. This year, I’m up to 10 or 11, a new record.

 

Then, a few days ago, I discovered large patches of mushrooms in my back yard and front yard, Interestingly, they were 2 different types of mushrooms. There have been mushrooms in the past but again this seems to be a record year. And no, I’m not making mushroom pies.

 

Ihis has truly been an unusual year as far as weather is concerned. We went through a long drought period followed by rains that approached deluge levels. The drought period did a real number on my lawn which is now green with many patches of yellow. Not a pretty sight!

 

Finally, a few words about the insect population! It’s been a strange year, bug wise, around here. I have not seen 1 mosquito or bee all summer long. It makes me wonder how my apple and cherry tree got pollinated without bees. I’m not complaining mind you. I sure don’t miss the mosquitoes. Come to think of it, I’ve only seen a few house flies. Don’t miss them either.

 

Any way, the bottom line is that I wonder why this year has been so strange. What does the Farmers Almanac say about it?

 

Has anyone else experienced similar events?

 

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GLOBAL WARMING   

 

 

 

 

Global warming! Climate change!

 

Call it what you what, it’s a major topic of discussion and debate among the public, the scientists, and especially the politicians, and rightfully so.

 

No one can definitively prove that humans are causing whatever it is. Here in the US, billions are being spent to try to alleviate our effect on the planet’s weather.

 

Unfortunately, it appears that few other countries around the globe share our concerns. India and China, the 2 most populous countries, are undoubtedly the biggest environmental polluters in the world, but don’t forget the other counties, particularly in South & Central America and Africa.

 

It seems to me that our real problem may be over population.

 

The other day I happened to be driving early in the morning when I noticed something I’d never really noticed before.

 

There’s a thermometer in my dash that shows the outside temperature. I drove for a few minutes on some side roads, and then entered onto I-80 in the middle of traffic hour. I noticed that the temperature went up by 5 degrees almost immediately when I entered the traffic.

 

It then occurred to me that it was the engine heat and emissions from thousands of cars that caused the increase. .And there is no doubt that the number of vehicles has grown astronomically over the years. When I moved here almost 50 years ago, traffic was not a problem.

 

Now, I sometimes have to wait to pull out of my own driveway on a quiet residential street.

 

Tonight, I heard John Kerry explaining why he and the current administration thought that global warming was the biggest threat to humanity. Not terrorists! Obviously, they have forgotten 9/11, Benghazi, and now Paris. He said that global warming would cause droughts and famines forcing  people around the globe to take up violence as a way to survive.

 

That may be true to a point, but let’s be logical. The current agitators and terrorists are nit new at this. It’s been going on for a thousand years. It’s an ideological war not a climate change war. Seems to me that the two issues are basically not connected.

 

Let me go back to my earlier premise, over population.

 

We’ve all seen the films depicting the poor starving people, especially the kids in Africa and other third world countries.  The swollen bellies and gaunt bodies are thought provoking.

 

Yes they are suffering through drought and famine, but trying to “control the climate” is not the answer. The simplest and quickest solution is population control.

 

If my gas bill is too high, I cut back on travel. If my heating or cooling bill is too high, I reset my thermostat.

 

It seems to me that a necessary part of any climate control program should include programs that help to limit population growth. China had a program for years that limited families to one child. Recently they changed that policy because several problems arose that were not anticipated.  Perhaps, other over populated areas could learn a lesson. Maybe a simple reward of some kind to limit pregnancies would work. A positive motivation. With all the billions of money being spent on climate control were spent on people instead, population control might work.

 

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SONNY’S ADVENTURES-FARM GAMES

 

Sonny spent many summers at his uncle’s dairy farm in northeast Pennsylvania and enjoyed many of the activities there that weren’t available back home in Jersey City, NJ, after the days chores were done, of course. After all, the cows had to be milked, the ripe crops reaped, and the farm maintained. There was no day off from those activities. But at days end, and on weekends, the farm life offered many things that Sonny didn’t get to do back in the city.

 

There were the obvious things like fishing and hunting. No, he was too young for actual game hunting, but he was allowed to take the 22 once in a while to hunt down the farmers nemesis, the wood chuck, or ground hog. The entry holes made by these animals to access their dens in the ground presented a real hazard to the legs of the cows and horses, and even to the wheel axles on the tractor. As a result, shooting them was an acceptable activity.

 

Fishing was also a treat for Sonny. Oh sure, he could go fishing in the ponds at the local parks in the city, but all he could catch were little killies, a local minnow of sorts. They never got very big and they were always thrown back into the pond, but it was fishing.

 

On the farm, it was a different story. There was a pond on the farm that had sunnies and bullheads, and these got big enough to cook and eat. Even better were the nearby lakes and creeks, where bass, bluegills, perch and pickerel could be caught. Those were to places where Sonny honed his fishing skills and developed his lifelong love of fishing.

 

The same local ponds and lakes became swimming holes and bathing areas after the work was done. And farm work was dirty work most of the time. After all, there was dirt and dust every where you worked and back in those days, there was no shower in the farmhouse, only a tub. During the warm months, it was much easier, and a lot more fun to bath at the local pond at the same time as you enjoyed swimming. We’d swim, then soap up, then swim, then soap, then……well, you get the point. Bathing was fun!

 

On weekends, there were other fun things to do, like roller skating at the highway roller rink. Or square dancing at the grange hall or simply hanging out at the town diner with other farm kids.

 

Of course, we played some of the games that I played in Jersey City like Hide and Seek, baseball, and even basketball.

 

Yes, the actual game we played was different from the city game.

 

For example, we didn’t have enough kids for a baseball game. In fact, there were usually only two of us, my cousin Joe and I. Once in a while my cousin Regina would make three. Because of that our games were usually simple variations on the batter hitting to the fielder routine. We’d take turns hitting the ball to each other until we got tired. And we didn’t have a nice flat field to play on. We’d usually play on the closest field where crops weren’t growing. It was a real test to avoid stepping in ruts, on rocks, or even woodchuck holes. And our equipment would be outlawed by today’s standards. Our bats were generally salvaged from discards thrown out elsewhere. The one I remember most had no knob at the end. It had broken off sometime in the past. But we simply filed away the sharp edges and used the old black, friction tape to make it more comfortable. That tape was the ‘50s version of duct tape. It could fix any broken item. It was also used on the baseballs we used. For a long time, I was unaware that baseballs had a stitched leather cover. I thought they all were covered with black friction tape. And when I first held a real baseball, I was amazed at how light it was compared to our taped versions.

 

They say that basketball is a city game and one can’t argue that today. But we played basketball on the farm too. In fact, we used a real bushel basket nailed onto an appropriate tree. There wasn’t much dribbling sing we didn’t play on pavement. But there was a lot of shot making, playing versions of what today’s kids call “Horse” or “Out”. Or we’d simply shoot foul shots. I’m sure that’s how the game really started and got its name.

 

Then there were the times that we played Hide and Seek. Sometimes it was in the evening in the area around the house. There were a lot of hiding places there. In fact, there were a number of buildings including the out house, a corn crib, some sheds. And one fallen down structure that was obviously used centuries earlier. OK, that’s an exaggeration, but to this day, I don’t know what that building was used for. You can imagine the fun Hide and Seek was in the evening and usually, there were 4 players because my other cousin, Anna Mae would join in the game.

 

Sometimes, we’d play in the barn. I always found that to be more fun than playing outside. The hay lofts, cow barn, straw barn, and silo all became ideal hiding spots, although sometimes safety became questionable, particularly in the straw barn. It was on the same level as the hay barn but in reality had no floor. All it had was a number of planks spaced across the beams. No floor was needed since the straw was so light. It was situated above the cow barn so that it could be forked down to the cow area when needed for bedding. I remember one game of Hide and Seek when I ran into the straw barn and immediately fell through the planks to the floor below. This presented me with an ideal escape to the house where I was sure that my cousins wouldn’t find me. Of course, it was cheating, but alls fair in love and hide and seek. My cousins may recall a different version of this story.

 

Speaking of the hay barn, it was actually the center of many other fun activities, especially when the hay lofts on each side were filled with fresh cut hay. The hay would be brought in from the fields on wagons pulled earlier by two horses named Babe and Bill, and later, the modern era, by a tractor. There was a large fork that dropped down from the highest beam in the barn into the wagon where it was pressed into the hay.  Then the horses or tractor would pull a forkful up to the tracks at the top of the bar, where it could be directed into the right or left hay loft. The job of the younger kids was to spread out the hay so that it would fill the loft uniformly, when we weren’t playing in it, of course.

 

When the hay wasn’t being brought in from the fields, the ropes used for unloading the hay and pulling it into the lofts, simply hung off to the sides of the barn. That’s when the hay lofts became the center ring of a circus trapeze act, and the loft the site for some dare devil jumping feats. When the hay was first spread in the lofts, we’d climb to the top of the barn frames and jump into the marshmallow bed of fresh hay. There were small platforms on each side of each loft near the top and we’d swing on the ropes from one side to the other, dropping off occasionally into the hay below, not unlike the rope swing down at the creek. There really was no end to the fun we had, or is that created. Sometimes I wonder how we survived; how we didn’t get hurt. Then I recall. We did get hurt sometimes.

 

My cousin Joe was three years older than me so I actually got to do things a lot of kids my age didn’t. I actually drove the tractor around the farm. Sometimes Joe would drive the tractor to visit a neighboring friend, or even to go into town, six miles away. Sometimes I sit on the wheel cover next to the drivers seat while he drove at speeds up to 25 or 30 miles per hour. Other times, I’d stand on the tongue projecting from the rear that was used to connect the wagon or other towed machines. After falling off the tongue a couple of times, I gave up that practice.

 

As you can see, I have a lot of good memories about my times on the farm. There were many other activities that I recall with fondness. Riding in the back of the pickup truck on a cool evening. Going to the movie house occasionally. Watching the Fourth of July fireworks from the hillside in back of the church in the nearby town. Roasting potatoes and marshmallows on a bonfire at night. Catching fireflies. Falling in love with a local lass for the first time (or was that two or three times). Climbing trees. Skipping stones across the pond or simply throwing stones. Etc, etc, etc.

 

I wonder how many of today’s kids will have the opportunities we did. I wonder if private property and liability laws will prevent many. I wonder how many kids will find their fun on the keyboard of their Nintendo games or with their Wii games. I know times change but I can’t help but wonder if it’s all for the better.

 

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CHRISTMAS CARDS

 

It’s that time of the year again. Yule, Christmas, the holidays!

 

My wife was almost fanatical about sending out Christmas cards. We used to send and receive about 70 or 80 every year. I would sting them up around our rec room. In a way they became part of our routine Christmas decor.

 

Like most married couples, I guess, I had little to do with the cards other than taking them to the post office. However, in the last six years, I’ve tried to carry on her fervor and continue to send out cards. She was quite organized and left behind, not only a complete address book, but also a ledger showing where cards went to and from.

 

I continue the habit.

 

This year I mailed out about 70 cards and as of 2 days after Christmas, I received about 50. That doesn’t bother me at all for a couple of reasons. One, many people are no longer around. After all, I’m 77, so many friends and relatives have passed. Also, the economy being what it is, many folks can’t afford the cost of the cards and stamp.

 

However, I took a look at the “to-from” list and I have noticed that many of the “old reliables” relatives and friends that always send cards did not send cards.

 

I really don’t have a problem with that except that I can’t help but wonder if there’s a problem. Are they OK? As I said, I’m getting old, so these thoughts are mostly about people my age.

 

I think that, after New Years day, I’ll be making some phone calls.

 

By the way, I received many of the family picture cards this year and I enjoy them. However, a suggestion to the folks that send them out-Why not sign a personal greeting on the back with a felt pen. It would make the a lot more personal,

 

Finally, the family newsletters are fine, but when I don’t recognize most of the names, what’s the point?

 

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BLONDS

 

It’s been over 6 years sine my wife passed away and I went through months of therapy for a serious cancer situation.  At first, I was just thankful to be alive and I really didn’t do a lot.

 

After a couple of years though, I found myself somewhat bored and actually quite lonely. After all, I was married for 47 years. Sure, I have family and they were and are very loving and caring. But living alone is difficult.

 

I decided to start going out and started by joining up with a 50 plus group. That led to going to dances and meeting a lot of new folks. Since I like to dance, meeting women seemed simple.

 

I went out with about 7 or 8 different women. All were quite good looking, personable, and seemed to enjoy my company. Of course, some never went beyond one date. I guess I wasn’t as desirable as I thought.

 

Anyway, I was thinking about the ladies the other day when a funny thought occurred to me. Every one of them was a blond, one shade or another, and they were all over 60, some over 70. I wondered if I was attracted to, or addicted to blond women.

 

My wife was what she referred to as a dirty blond. I think that simply means that her hair color was somewhere between a bleached blond and a light brunette. I’m not sure. She certainly wasn’t a dirty person.

 

I thought back to my boyhood days. I’ve always been attracted to girls and I dated many through the years. But I have gone out with redheads, brunettes, and raven haired girls. Somehow though, blonds were always there. In fact, my very first love of my life, in kindergarten, was a cute little blond. Of course that may have been because she was the only girl in my class smaller than me since I was a runt.

 

Getting back to recent times, I have now been dating one particular blond for about 3 years. We are getting along great and I think we’ll be together for awhile..

 

But another thought came to mind!. When I was younger, most, older, blond ladies could be actually described as having orange hair. I wonder if today’s blonds just have better dyes because I don’t see too many orange headed older ladies nowadays.

 

Also I wonder if women, as they age simply turn blond, just as men go bald. I wonder!

 

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DAYLIGHT SAVING TIME

 

Just recently, we had to go through the semi annual exercise of resetting all the clocks and watches that we use. I don’t know about you, but personally I think this is a huge waste of time.

 

I really can’t think of a valid, modern reason for doing this.

 

Historically, people cite several factors.

 

First, they talk about the farmers gaining an advantage because it stays light out longer. I guess when you had a team of horses or a small tractor that was important, Nowadays, most farmers are actually large ventures with large, lighted equipment. They have GPS devices to guide them in the dimly lit hours.

 

A second thing that’s always mentioned is the safety of children going to and from school. This I don’t understand. In the morning, when kids typically leave about 7 AM, It’s pretty light. So we set the clocks back an hour, and it’s 6 AM and it’s light. They have another hour before they leave and it gets lighter. Where’s the benefit? After school, most kids leave around 3 PM.  Again, where’s the benefit?

 

Another fact, Halloween falls on Oct. 31. We change the clocks this year on Nov. 2. That basically means that it got dark earlier. Halloween is historically a dangerous time for kids on the streets of America. Why would we enhance the danger? I simply don’t get it!

 

Other factors  perceived as negatives are the disruptions in the circadian rhythm of many people, changing sleeping schedules, and even mood changes because it get lighter or darker at different times, creating a negative effect on the peoples regular routines. This has been the subject of study at many institutions.

 

I just don’t believe that there is a valid reason for changing our clock twice a year. In fact, Some areas such as Hawaii, Arizona and many of the Western territories like Guam do not recognize DST. Several states have more than 1 time zone, adding to the confusion.

 

Finally, think about th effect of changing times twice yearly on scheduled events like meetings, sports, entertainment, etc.

 

I think I’ve made my point! There really is no longer a reason for changing times. Meet halfway and leave it there.

 

 

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THE GOLD TEES 

 

I know most folks don’t play golf, but many do. I do and I really like the game.

 

I wrote a while back about the 4 main reasons I play the game.

 

The first is the exercise. Most courses are around 6000 yards in length as the crow flies. The way I play, sometimes is referred to as army golf. Right, left, right left, etc. At my age, I choose to ride in a golf cart, and I still average about 2 miles of walking per round. Add that to swinging the club 95 to 105 times, okay, 150 to 160 with practice swings, and I get a lot of exercise, not to mention the sunshine (most days) that helps my vitamin D.

 

The second reason is the friends you meet, even if you’ll never see them again. I play golf with my best friend but that only makes us a twosome. Many times, when the course is crowded, they’ll pair us off with two others. I must tell you that the vast majority of people I’ve met that way were real gentlemen and ladies. Yes, there are many ladies playing golf. Finally, our usual course, because of location and price, seems to host many seniors. Of course, they’re all retired and have the time. I must say that most golfers are very nice people.

 

The third reason is the scenery. We usually play at what I call our home course although we are not actual members. But every so often, we play different courses, not only for the golf variety bit also for the change in scenery. By their very nature and design, golf courses have inherent and individual scenery. I really enjoy those variations.  Beats the heck out of watching TV!

 

The final reason I play, even at this age, is the game itself, and the competition between friends. I’m not sure about the women, but men, even in their seventies and eighties, want to win. Golf is a perfect venue to show off your skills and competitive spirit.

 

That brings me to the title of this piece.

 

Most courses have several things in common. They have either 18 or 9 holes, altho’ mist have 18. They all have several par 3 holes, several par 4, and several par five. Par simply means the number of shots a proficient golfer would need to tee off and sink the ball at the green. Obviously, par 5’s  are longer and more difficult. A typical par for a given course is 72. Personally, I never shot a 72, altho’ I came close on a 9 hole course.

 

To continue, in an attempt to even up the odds, much like a handicap in bowling, most courses have 3 or 4 tee locations, starting at the farthest distance from the green and ending at the closest. At the course I usually play, they have 4 tee sites. The blues, normally called the pros, you should be an above average player. They are normally positioned to make the hole as difficult as possible.

 

The next tees are normally the whites. These are for the average golfer, easier than the blues, simply because they are closer to the green.

 

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DEAD AT 75

 

The media today spent a lot of time reporting on a statement made by Ezekiel Emanuel, MD, Ph.D. In short, he said in an Atlantic magazine article titled “Why I hope to die at 75” and reaffirmed that during a later interview.

 

What? I’ll be 77 in a few weeks and I have no desire to die. I’m a cancer survivor, having gone through colorectal cancer in 2008. I wasn’t ready to die then and I’m not ready yet.

 

Two pertinent facts! He is a specialist in medical ethics and does not believe in euthanasia. Coincidentally, he is the brother of Rahm Emanuel the ex Chief of Staff to Pres. Obama and now mayor of Chicago. He is also one of the architects of the Obamacare program.

 

Dr. Emanuel cites the increasing costs of medical care, the onset of Alzheimer’s, and even a lack of productivity as reasons to die at 75.

 

My response? Are you kidding me?

 

Speak for yourself Dr. Emanuel. I go dancing almost every week. I’m playing golf better now than since before my cancer treatment. I recently took flying lessons. And my writings continue to pour out.

 

Am I in great health? The answer is yes, for an old man. I continue to use the medical profession, mainly to control my blood pressure. In spite of wearing an ostomy pouch, I continue to do most everything I want to do. And by the way, I do pay about $5000 for my hospitalization insurance. It’s not free!

 

In summing up, I will continue to be active as long as I can. If I died at 75, that would have meant that I quit on life. I still have many years that I’m looking forward to!

 

<림Ş>  

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MEXICO

 

I must admit that I am terribly confused as to our relationship with our southern neighbor, Mexico. We are both part of North America but we are as different as night and day. We don’t speak the same language and our cultures are quite different. One would think that we’d have a relationship similar to that we have with our northern neighbor, Canada, but we don’t.

 

I sincerely try to find positives in our dealings with Mexico but they are precious few. And while we have millions of Mexicans living in the US, we should remember that we once were at war with them. “Remember the Alamo!”  One would hope that they would join us in our efforts against world wide terrorism but it seems they have enough on their plate with the drug cartels and ongoing drug wars.

 

Those very same drug wars and cartels pose a major problem for the US since Mexico is the major drug pipeline into our country. Mexico appears to be unable to control that situation. In fact Mexico seems to be unable to control its own borders north or south. She doesn’t seem to care who comes into the country from central America, as witnessed the thousands of central Americans that make their way north and cross, illegally, into the US. Mexico does little to stem the tide on its northern border as well. Witness the 60.000 or so children (?) that recently crossed the border into the US. Now it seems that we are morally bound to process them, feed them, house them, educate them, and take care of their medical needs. While I am sympathetic to their home country problems, it’s not feasible for the US to take responsibility for them. These illegal border crashers should be returned home and our borders should be secured so it doesn’t continue.

 

Lastly, I’ll bring up the case of Sgt. Tahmooress, the marine that’s been held prisoner in Mexico for months simply because he made a wrong turn. Why our officials have done little to get him freed is beyond me, They sure found a way to send AG Holter and others to Furguson. But as far as I’ve heard, no one from the administration has gone to Mexico expressly to negotiate his release. Even our own Gov. Christi just came back fro a trade mission there and no mention of the Sgt.’s status was made.

 

It seems to me that we have to get the attention of Mexican officials. Here’s one proposal.

 

We send Mexico about a billion dollars a year in foreign aid. I guess that’s in support of the war against drugs but that doesn’t appear to be working, It’s time for a different approach. I think we should deduct the costs involved with these 60,000 children (?) should be deducted from our foreign aid totals. I did the arithmetic. One billion dollars  divided by 60.000 is approximately $16.000. Ironically that is a figure that I read recently as to the actual costs of taking care of these children. That means Mexico gets zero. Do you think they’ll notice if we stop the foreign aid?.

 

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HI DAD!!!

 

As a father of three sons, I’ve noticed something that disturbs me a bit in recent TV broadcasts and commercials.

 

I’m sure that we’ve all seen those spots where the camera pans across the teams on their benches, or the individual players after they make a good play when they mug for the camera and say “Hi Mom!”

 

Then, there’s the recent soup commercials, where a football player is served soup by his Mom prior to or during a game. I understand the logic behind the commercials but I wonder-----“Where are the Dads?”

 

I’m pretty sure it wasn’t the Mom that taught the player how to tackle or play football. Surely they encouraged it and supported their sons in every way they could but what happened to the Dads?

 

I coached all three of my sons in Little League, Babe Ruth and several other athletic endeavors and I’m sure that these pro players had some input from their Dads. So why can’t we hear “Hi Dad!” for once.

 

I know that there’s been a real breakdown in family unity and values over the past few decades and I know that being a single Mom ahs become a virtual norm but it seems to me that most births require a Mom AND a Dad. So fellas, please give us Dads a break.

 

Say “Hi Dad!” once in a while.

 

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SOMETIMES, I WONDER!

 

Some of my friends say that I think too much. They might be right but I just can’t help myself. I’m always pondering things, situations, and events that I notice day in and day out.

 

For example, I pass dozens of car dealers during my travels, every ay. I’ve noticed that most have dozens, if not hundreds of new and used cars on their lots. When I consider all the dealers that are not only in my area, but around the entire country, there must be millions of brand new automobiles every year that go unsold. I really have to wonder what happens to all of them when the “new” models are brought in. Do they get shipped overseas or get modified to meet the new year standards. I wonder!

 

Then there’re things that I see at the local supermarket! Many items have a defined shelf life, especially items like bread, dairy products, meat, and so on. Obviously, not everything is sold before the noted use by or sell by dates. I wonder what happens to all the “expired items”. Are they simply thrown out or donated to charities or re-marked with new dates? I wonder.

 

Recently, NJ and NY were devastated by Hurricane Sandy. Thousands of homes, miles of beach front, miles of boardwalks, many businesses, and even amusement parks were totally destroyed. I’ve seen hours upon hours of the clean up operations on the TV. Homes were moved hundreds of feet from their original foundation, Entire villages were leveled. When you look at the videos, you can’t help but be amazed by the rubble and debris that was left behind. It’s a massive continuing effort to clean up the areas. But one thing puzzles me! I wonder what happens to all the debris, the ruined furniture, the lumber, and all the ruined personal belongings that are trucked away. What do they do with it? Is there a bottomless abyss somewhere or a black hole that swallows everything up? I wonder!

 

There’s something else I wonder about. It’s not original with me. I first heard about this years ago, but I still wonder. I was driving along the interstate the other day when I noticed a series of long skid marks and it occurred to me that those black marks were actually embedded rubber particles. Then I thought about the normal wear on all the millions of tires on every road throughout the country. Tires wear out due to normal wear and tear. Tiny particles of rubber are worn away from every tire, on every vehicle, on every road. There are actually legal limits on when you should replace a bald tire. But did you ever wonder what happens to all that rubber particulate matter. It’s not on the roads since they don’t turn black and don’t become elevated. Rain doesn’t wash it to the sides of the road or the areas along the pavement would be black, and they’re not. They certainly don’t fill potholes. Where does all that rubber go? I wonder!

 

I have a large hickory tree in my front yard that produced more nuts this year than ever before. I spent may hours raking up the nuts and using the for mulch, or simply disposing of the shells with the leaves or garbage. It’s been going on for many weeks now and, thankfully, I believe the tree is done dropping the nuts. I once heard an old timer say that a large harvest of nuts, hickory or otherwise, was a harbinger of a bad winter. I don’t live in a rural area but I think that’s probably true. Mother Nature has a way of being right. Besides, during a round of golf last week, we found a large, very dark, almost black caterpillar. That’s also said to be a sign of a bad coming winter. In any case, the hickory nut harvest proved to be a boon to between 10 and 20 squirrels and chipmunks that made  regular visits to my front yard.  They are probably all set for whatever this winter brings the area. But the entire situation made me think. I have had many deer visit my property feasting on apples from a tree in the back yard and on the flocks which decorated the front. I have had bear visit my property as well as a ground hog (woodchuck) or two, a possum, a skunk, a few stray cats and dogs. I have found droppings on the property from most of them. But I have never found dropping from squirrels or chipmunks. Based on the hundreds of pounds of hickory nut shell I amassed, I have to assume that these animals ate their full and therefore, according to natural law, should leave droppings. I haven’t found any. Also, I have not been able to see where they are storing the winters supply of nuts. I wonder about both items. Why are there no droppings and where is their cache of nuts? I wonder!

 

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APPLE SEASON                      VFB  ©  September, 2013

 

It’s late September and signs of autumn are everywhere. Leaves are starting to fall. It gets dark earlier. The lawn doesn’t need mowing as often. Football dominates the television channels. Baseball talk centers around the playoffs and world series and, oh yeh, my apple tree has loads of apples. They are falling off the tree by the dozens.

 

I should note that it not a normal apple tree but what is referred to as a crab apple tree. Crab apples are edible although smaller and tarter than the apples you buy in the supermarket.

 

However, from what I learned on the internet, crab apples make great apple pie, apple cobblers, and other apple pastries. I know they are edible because I have eaten several right off the tree. My wife was a very good cook and I remember that she baked an apple pie with apples from my tree occasionally. In fact, she bought a high quality device that pared, cored, and sliced an apple with just a few turns of the handle.

 

I’ve never been much of a cook, much less a chef. My idea of cooking primarily entails pushing the start button on the microwave. But now, in my mid seventies, and a widower, I sometimes dare to try new things, new to me at least. So I decided to try my hand at making an apple pie. I’m not daring enough to try making the crust from scratch though so I bought a pre packaged pie crust mix.

 

The tree was helpful in that many apples were already on the ground and with the help of a long pole, I managed to knock off quite a few more. When I thought I had enough to meet the demand of an apple pie recipe I googled, I brought them into the house, eager to bake my first, virgin apple pie. But my confidence wavered and they sat in a bowl on my dining room table for a couple of days.

 

It was only a couple of days later when I decided to take the plunge and start baking.

 

I brought out the handy, dandy apple parer/corer/slicer and secured it to the kitchen table using the built in suction cup and started the process. I must say that the device worked well. In fact, it was sort of fun. I cranked and watched the peels come off in an spiral and when I removed the peeled apple, the core stayed behind. It was sliced and all I had to dp was put the slices in a bowl. The peels went directly into the trash bag and provided an unexpected benefit. The aroma of apples permeated the kitchen better than an aerosol.

 

When the apple prep was done, I prepared the mix by adding the ingredients called for in the recipe I selected. Cinnamon, nutmeg, sugar, flour and salt! I thought about them a bit, wondering why one would use both sugar and salt. Isn’t that counterproductive? And I had no idea what nutmeg tasted like. I’m not really sure what purpose the flour served but I put it in anyway. After several minutes of “gently stirring”, I put the mix on the side and began to prepare the crust, using the well known, fool proof mix I’d bought for the purpose.

 

Apparently, the creators of this mix never met a fool like me.

 

I prepared for the crust making by recalling what my grandmother, mother, and wife did. I brought out the wooden board and rolling pin. I sprinkled the board with flour. I also made the pie crust mix following the directions on the box exactly, kneading the dough thoroughly, until it “looked” right.

 

Unfortunately, I discovered that all that didn’t matter.

 

I formed the dough into two equal balls; one for the bottom the other for the top crust.

When I started to flatten the balls and roll out the dough into a flat shape, I found that it was adhering to the roller and the board, despite the liberal sprinkling of flour. It seemed to me that it would have made a great adhesive. I sprinkled flour all over the place and it didn’t really help. Finally, I had a somewhat flat, round piece of dough that I tried to “peel” off the board. That proved to be an impossibility without ripping it apart. Then I discovered it wasn’t big enough to cover the 9 inch pie plate. So I added some dough from what would have been the top crust.

 

Finally, after getting the bottom crust into the pie plate, I filled it with the prepared apple stuffing. It turned out that the top couldn’t be covered by the dough I had left, so I improvised and put the whole thing in the oven anyway. In truth, it took me longer to clean up the table and wooden board because of all the flour I sprinkled than it took to make the pie.

 

To make a long story short, the pie turned out OK. The filling was really good and the crust not so much, but heating a slice in the microwave, adding a scoop of ice cream turned it into a treat.

 

But I’ll be honest! The next time I want an apple pie, I’ll buy one, either freshly made or a frozen one that you just put into the oven. Baking just doesn’t seem to be one of my strengths.

 

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THINGS I LIKE

 

I read an opinion piece recently by Raymond Bateman, a long time NJ legislator, wherein he writes about many things that “bug” him as he drives around the state.

 

I really enjoyed it and agree on many of his observations. However, I decided to take the polar opposite view and write about things I like.

 

For example, I like when I see kids running around outside playing games, and chasing each other, instead of sitting around hypnotized by their Game Boy, iPad, or other electronic seductress.

 

I like when I see a polite driver give another a break at a busy intersection.

 

I like when I see polite teens holding doors for others and saying “Thanks” and “Please”

 

I like summer, outdoor, music concerts, especially ‘50s & ‘60s music.

 

I like interesting conversations, whether I agree or disagree with the others.

 

I like watching my grand kids growing up.

 

I like when my GPS gets me where and when I want to be there.

 

I like when I see folks walking their dogs and picking up behind them.

 

I like when the weather cooperates with my planned golf date.

 

I like when I see the final completion to a long running road project that has wreaked havoc on traffic.

 

I like when I rarely catch all five green lights between my house and I-80.

 

I like when the meal I’ve never made before turns out great.

 

I like having a banana split for dinner every so often, rather than a conventional meal.

 

I like my Windows XP and hate the Windows 8.

 

I like my current cell phone. It has 2 great apps. One allows me to send and receive calls and the other stores many numbers for easy recall.

 

I like when a baby or toddler smiles at me. Their innocence is heart warming.

 

 

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BANNED WORDS               VFB   ©    August, 2013

 

Talk about thin skins and extreme political correctness!

 

I just read a report out of Seattle that should get people aroused. The report headline stated that Seattle officials call for ban on “potentially offensive” language.

 

I have no problem with curtailing offensive language but details in this case boggle my mind.

 

The report says that the Office of Civil Rights instructed employees to curtail use of the words “citizen” and “brown bag”.  Apparently many folks in Seattle are residents but not citizens, so to avoid offending them, they recommend the use of the word citizens.

 

One question! Why not use both words in their proper context?

 

The phrase “brown bag” is seemingly also offensive to African Americans. The report says that the color of the bag was used to judge skin color. Really? I brown bagged it for years in school and in my early jobs. It simply meant I was bringing my own lunch from home and not eating out. I never once held it up to any of my African American friends to check the depth of their skin color. The Office suggests the phrases “lunch and learn” or “sack lunch” might be a good option. Common sense might be a better one!

 

Along similar lines, the New York Post reported that the words dinosaurs, birthdays, and Halloween have been shunned by the Department of Education. They report that the word “dinosaur” evokes images of evolution; birthdays are not celebrated by Jehovah’s Witnesses; and Halloween suggests a connection to Paganism.

 

Think about all this carefully. The words I mentioned are all parts of our common language, in use for years. Have any of you ever been offended by them? I think not!

 

Seems to me that the United States is going off the deep end in the attempts to maximize political correctness. Seems to me that I am proud to be a citizen of this country, that I brown bagged it to work for years; that I am overjoyed to celebrate my birthdays as a now five year cancer survivor.

 

I also loved the movie Jurassic park and never once thought about human evolution during the movie or its sequels.

 

Finally, imagine telling millions of American kids, past and present, that Halloween no longer exists. Isn’t that the same as advancing the cause of Paganism? I wonder! Maybe us Christians should protest?

 

I believe that it’s time to put a stop to all these efforts at political correctness. Maybe the government and education employees pushing in this direction should be evaluated by a vote of the everyday citizens (yes, I said citizens), to validate their ability to lead, guide, and educate.

 

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The weather here in NJ has been wild this year. But it seems like nothing is changing. Here’s a piece I wrote back in 2009!

 

 

HOT ENOUGH FER YA?

 

Victor F. Banko      August 20, 2009

 

One of the most common greetings I’ve heard for the last week is, “Hot enough fer ya?” Seems like everyone is suffering through what, so far, is a mini heat wave.

 

I live in New Jersey, and for those who are unaware, we have had a very unusual spring and summer to date. It has been very cool and very rainy, in spite of global warming. I’m not sure of the exact numbers but I think we had rain 26 of the 30 days in June and July wasn’t much better, The vacation and holiday plans of many folks were ruined by the poor weather. Many people wondered what happened to our summer. It’s almost time for the children to return to school and we still hadn’t had a 90° day. No one was talking about global warming.

 

There were benefits, of course. Our reservoirs are in very good shape, virtually full. Lawns and gardens are also in good condition, greener than most normal, hot summers. Vehicles get a regular, natural washing, removing road dust and grime before it accumulates. Air conditioning costs are much lower than in most years. And finally, family group activities seem to be better than ever since they spend more time indoors, together.

 

But we humans are a fickle group. Here we were just a few days ago complaining about the lack of a summer, and the loss of recreation time and now we’re carping about the heat. When will this oppressive air change?  After all, this has been going on for 5 or 6 days already. I wonder when this will end. Look at my lawn. It’s burning up. I had to water my plants every day this week. My air conditioner has been running constantly for days now.

 

Yep! We are a funny group, we humans. Some of us are never satisfied. The weather seems to be a major target for our griping, even though there’s nothing we can do about it.

 

Is it hot enough fer ya? Don’t worry. This is New Jersey. The weather will change in 5 minutes.

 

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DANCING WITH THE SENIORS               

 

I have always liked to dance. Even now, in my mid ‘70s, my significant other and I go dancing almost every weekend. There is no shortage of venues for us to trip the light fantastic. We might even be referred to as groupies since we have a couple of bands that we tend to “follow”.

 

Because of our ages, we like groups that play music of the 50s, 60s, and 70s, for the most part. I guess we might be considered good dancers and ever since I first met my lady, at a dance of course, we seem to have been a pretty good pairing on the dance floor.

 

Our interest in dancing doesn’t end when we leave the dance floor. We both really enjoy watching the TV show, “Dancing with the Stars”, whether we’re together or not. Sometimes well be talking on the phone as we watch the show and talk about the performances. It’s fun to watch the stars, ranging from football players, to actresses, to comedians, to Olympic athletes, all of whom are not really outstanding dancers, progress through the weeks, becoming more and more adept. In fact, it’s interesting that over the years, professional football players have won twice and this year another football player is doing quite well.

 

The other day, we were discussing the show and I said, with tongue in cheek, that they should tailor the show to our age demographic and air a “Dancing with the Seniors” special. I’m sure that many of our friends would find it interesting.

 

Of course, the rules, regulations, and specifics for the show would need to be amended to compensate for the different abilities, stamina, and tendencies of the average 60, 70, or 80 year old.

 

For starters, all contestants would have to be over 65 years old. Proof of age, such as birth certificates or drivers licenses (although drivers licenses may have been denied to some) would be required. AARP membership will not qualify since they start members at 50 years of age. Even the professional dancers on the show must meet this criteria. However, they should be easy to find teaching line dancing or zumba at local senior citizen centers, churches, etc.

 

The dance selection must be modified as well. Hip hop, rap, contemporary, and acrobatic dances would not be allowed due to the increased chance of injuries particularly to those with arthritis or brittle bones. Preferred, even compulsory, dances would include the fox trot, waltzes, and line dancing.

 

I’m not sure what physical or medical support they have at the “DWTS” performances but it’s obvious that certain facilities and equipment would be required at the “DWTSRS”. As a minimum, an ambulance should be stationed nearby, warmed up. Also, within easy range there should be a defibrillator, oxygen tanks, stretchers, and a qualified, geriatric physician. After all, one never knows! At the very least, an adequate supply of Tynenol. Aleve, Ben Gay, and other senior preferred medications should be available.

 

Finally, the judges should be carefully selected. There’s no need to have experienced professional dancers or teachers. To be blunt, there probably won’t be many little details or dance nuances that need be recognized. Perhaps, people more familiar with senior capabilities would be more appropriate. With that in mind, a judge’s panel might include senior (pun intended) management from Medicare, AARP, or local senior citizen residences. Other sources might be the Social Security Administration or local municipality senior clubs. Every town seems to have at least one.

 

A fitting end to the evening might be a show sponsored dinner at a local restaurant offering half off to senior citizens.

 

 

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ANTS-THE ULTIMATE CREATURE

 

I usually keep my donuts and cookies on a counter top next to the refrigerator in the middle of my kitchen as, I’m sure, many other folks do.

 

Anyway, when I lifted the donut box to get one, I found that there were dozens of tiny, little ants, milling about. There may have been hundreds. They were on the counter top, in the donut box, and on the side of the refrigerator.

 

Needless to say, my appetite for a donut waned dramatically.

 

I swatted as many as I could and then retrieved an ant killer spray from the garage. The remaining donuts were also sprayed and thrown in the trash.

 

But that’s not what this story is about!

 

These ants were very tiny indeed, not like the normal ants you find around the yard. These were only about a tenth of an inch long; 0.10 inches. Look at a ruler. That’s very small.

 

The counter top was in the middle of my kitchen, about 12 feet from the nearest outside wall and 3 feet high.

 

In spite of my unhappiness over the lost donuts, I couldn’t help but wonder how these little, tiny creatures could travel at least 12 feet, climb a vertical wall 3 feet high and add probably another 6 feet of random maneuvering to find food that for all intents and purposes had no discernible odor. In fact, how did they know that the donuts were there?

 

That seemed amazing to me!

 

Let me convert that into human dimensions.

 

I’m about 5 foot seven. Oh, OK, make that 5”6” and a half. Anyway, if I translate the ants ,1 inch into my 5’7”. The 12’ trip, 3’ wall, and 6’ maneuvering would equate to  1.52 miles, 201’, and 402’, respectively.

 

I know it’s not an exact comparison, but think about it. I’d have to walk over a mile and a half, climb a 200’ vertical wall, just to get to some food. I found that admirable since I know I can’t do it. The walk maybe! The 200 ‘wall? No way. I have trouble climbing a flight of stairs sometimes. Sensing that there’s food 1.5 miles away? No way! Not unless I had an advertisement in my hands.

 

I really started to have a new appreciation for these ants. It seemed to me that they are the closest thing to a super being that I know. I decided to learn more about them, so I went to the all knowing google site on my PC. I found out many interesting things about ants. For example, there are over 12,000 species and they are found on every continent except Antarctica, which somehow sounds like an oxymoron. They have been around for millions of years, dating back to the Jurassic Age, at least. They are related biologically to wasps and bees and there are many variations. Some are extremely toxic, such as fire ants in the southern US and some ant bites can be fatal. They range in size from .08” to 1” and can be very destructive. Think about Carpenter ants.

 

Ants live within a very social structure. Generally there is a queen and her followers although some species have more than one queen. They are also very strong considering their size and can lift and carry three times their weight.

 

I could probably ramble on for some time but I think that ants are a very interesting species worthy of knowing better. I suggest that it might be worth your while to learn more since it’s obvious they will be around for many eons to come.

 

Let me close by saying that I have a new admiration for this tiny creature but that won’t stop me from destroying them whenever they invade my pantry.

 

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The four remaining shuttles will be retired to various sites. Endeavour will go to the California Science Center in Los Angles, Atlantis to the Kennedy Space Center in Florida, and Enterprise to the Intrepid Sea Air Space Museum in New Y

 

 

Victor F. Banko  (C)    Dec. 3,  2015